dust yourself off and try again

So, I really expected a bit of a different response when I stood up to read in class the other day. Kat-Spleen, you’re right, that was a Dr. Morris question. And very necessary. “What’s the point? Why should be want to read this or give a shit?” I guess up until you asked that question, it seemed to me that I was getting to the point, but in the meantime, I was entertaining, wasn’t I?

(By the way, I don't know if Kathleen is subscribed to my blog, but if anyone is confused or offended by my calling her "Kat-Spleen", don't be. Ask anyone who has had Bleach for WRI 100-or maybe for any class- about the first day of class and having to recall out loud EVERYONE'S name. Bleach gave her that name, which I love. I hope she does too :-)

I tend to take things to the extreme sometimes. Hopefully, no one takes that personally. It’s just me. So I started anew with this piece. I didn’t throw the other one in the trash. There are still two cuts of it on my flash drive (the only one I can find :-P). They will wait there in case I need to go back for something... I don’t know that I will.

This time I am cutting out the whole travel of the dollar bills. Actually, I’m not attempting to make use of lyric, or circle around any ideas. I’m sticking with montage, however; I quite enjoy the snapshots. I haven’t gotten too far yet, and I know I am really late in the game to be starting from scratch. Ah, it’s kind of what I do. So far I like it.

When I asked the question the other day, “How far toward Fiction can a CNF get?” Well, Matt, thank you so much for you quick, simple response... that that decision is up to me. With this re-write, I find I am being so, so very close to the truth of things I know of the casino in which I work. I won’t name names or places. If I do use propers, they are fictitious, but still completely representative of two huge parts of my life... work and motherhood.

I am hoping to express exactly what my point is with this new piece. I've never been over imaginative to the point of creating complete fiction, at least I don't think; there are always some elements of my own truth showing through. I probably exaggerate a bit on the character based on myself and my situation. And I imagine the finer details of the other character, based on details coming from first hand acquaintances.

I hate to think I am getting all the ideas for this essay from classmates and Dr, Morris. I suppose that's just another way we learn here at KU... at least for NOW. (Thanks Corbett.)

And speaking of GOP saying "FU" to KU.... I dropped off some of my Essence copies at Global Libations last night. Got into a talk with the little hippie chick working there. When I told her about the op-ed and that I'd probably send it to Harrisburg, she was like "Oh yeah, the Patriot. That's all anyone reads. I'm from there." Ok so that settles it for me. Let's see how Boss Man Corbett takes the editorial whoopin' from this non-traditional. He might be a few peoples' boss, but not mine. AND I've learned in Leadership class that not all managers are leaders... how well do YOU think he even MANAGES Pennsylvania? Did anyone have their op-eds published anywhere? What about the CNF? I know I shouldn't have all my eggs in one basket with the first CNF, but I think "A Public Space" would be a really nice place :-P a good fit. But damn, I still need to have my piece published from last term. Any ideas on where to send a a creative anonymous profile of a lesbian who has dealt with the same issues straight women deal with, and then some?

montage plus ?

The ideas I got in class the other day were good ideas, no doubt. However, integrating lyric with montage is a bit harder than I thought. Several of my snapshots are in a way talking around an idea, sort of. They're thoughts, though I never specifically say who's thoughts. I think this can be inferred. So far I have a few snapshots, though it seems like a long way to the end of what I am trying to say. I know I said in class that I think and write in metaphor all the time, but lyric feels so much more different that I realized. It reminds me of charades or something, giving the hints, dancing around the answer. Being a bit vague is difficult when the statement that I want to make is so very clear in my mind. Anyway, so far...
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one

Snap! You steal that which holds my brothers and I together; you send me off into the world with only a few of my family. To the others, I wish you luck.

Oh! This confinement is worse than before. Shoved into a dark space, you’re causing me to fold; you take my strength for granted.

two

“So dear, where do you want to go tonight? I’m thinking we should try that new Italian place in the casino. They advertise it as ‘rustic’ Italian. What do you think that means?”

three

Where am I? This place is stifling; I can barely breathe. I sweat.

four

“Honey, the reservation is for seven o’clock. Would you just turn into the valet area already?! It’ll take forever to find a spot on our own…Come on! It’s worth a few extra bucks. We knew that we were coming to the casino, that we’d spend a little more than we usually do on Friday…we can afford it.”

five

I think I see a light. Yes. Yes. Oh, a weight has been lifted. Wait, wait. Where are you taking my brothers?! Please stop…

A few more of my brothers have been freed. Or have they been taken elsewhere to be further tortured…

Under cover of night again. I sweat. A few of my family are still nearby.

six

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That's as far as I got. I'll probably use parts of the other piece I posted. I hate to keep putting chunks of my essay on here, but I don't think that many people are looking anyway. And honestly, I need help with this one, if I intend on using montage and, especially, lyric.